Something....

Something,
something's not right,
can't figure out what,
its just not right,

The past few days,
well,
apart from Friday night,
something's up,

Can't figure it out,
am met with boredom,
the cold shoulder,
almost like disdain,

I send,
i call,
no replies,
no answer,

All i get is a call,
muted,
mellow,
disinterested,

The first time,
what i offered,
received,
a flat no,

Something,
something's not right,
I hope and pray,
that you are all right,
cos something tells me,
I won't see you tonight...

Slipup...

The day started pretty cool, ok not the weather part.. was dreary and gloomy, dark clouds and pitter patter of the occasional raindrops... but hey... i was going to get closer today...

and then it changed... must have been the lack of sleep... must have been cause i got too excited about it... or was looking forward to it too much... either way... kind of ruined the mood...

i'm guessing its also cause of the lack of exercise i'm getting... haha what a conclusion... but seriously... according to stats and blah blah, or rather mostly from my own experience.. i find that working out or building up a sweat regularly from time to time is pretty therapeutic and boosts your energy level... yeah yeah this is also a good excuse to get down and dirty with someone.. but hey... it does work!!!! though even sports or a visit to the gym helps..

what a bunch of doodles.. thats my thought train for today... was dumb to let my guard down but shit happens... only thing i regret is i showed some of that disappointment and regret... ah well... the world turns... the wind blows...

Croft...

Sitting here,

letting my mind drift...

it was supposed to,

but i don't know why,

it drifted to you...

What I feel for you,

I can't describe...

or maybe,

I'm afraid to describe it...

Cause of the answer,

an answer I think I already know,

I thought it would be a while,

before I ever felt this way again...

I haven't told you this,

but I'm happy its with you,

our situations are imperfect,

both our lives somewhat shattered...

not the happy ending we let ourselves dream it would be,

Maybe that's why,

I'm so attracted to you,

maybe that's why,

I'm falling for you,

There's a lot I love about you,

maybe that's why,

I'm so afraid,

I kept trying to hold back...

But when I learnt how you,

were feeling about me,

it got harder and harder,

to be cautious,

I'm at a loss...

like you once said to me,

I'm more than just missing you....

Silent Night... Restless Night...

its a quiet night... The creepy crawlies and network Gremlins seem fast asleep... Comforted in their cocoons of unexplained congestion, timeouts and the like... a calm night... The shrill ringing of on-call deathly silent... a peaceful night...

So much can only be said of the bearer... Neurons firing Rx Tx blasting away into oblivion... the pounding whirling spinning of imaginary rotors and firing pistons... Crimped straights and mismatched crosses overcome only by Medium Dependent Interfaces and negotiating duplexes.. One could say a loop would occur and i would have a meltdown...

A highly unlikely event... I'd just fall into neutrality... If history is to teach me anything, its that in the past 2 decades I have failed to have a crisis or a meltdown... The mind is a mighty processor indeed, the dwindling thoughts and foggy auspices of dreams are all managed... Allowed to run amok only so much before logic kicks in...

Still don't make me any saner or stop me from goofing up... But hey... Like ENIAC filled a room, Archimedes needed a tub... Troy had its horse... and computers its trojans and worms... Everything has an Achilles heel... No amount of faith sunk into any protection can save ones precious information... Though I have to say Kaspersky does a damn fine job of it! Even if in the process it decides to play havoc with your patience at the beginning...

Enough burbles... the night while young, its remainder must be spent recuperating... for tomorrow is another day... Most undoubtedly to be comically marred by a vision of '123' on my screen... >:)